I am thankful to have a family to love!
I hope that my family loves me, but I am more content knowing I have family to love. The same is true of friends - I do not know if they love me, but I am blessed to have people in my life to love. Can you imagine living in a world where you didn't haven't any family or friends to love?
I am thankful that I don't experience the stress of basic survival!
My stress if my worry for my families safety and health. I am blessed with food to eat, clothes to wear, shoes for my feet, safe home and a warm bed. If I go to bed hungry - I can get up and eat, if my feet get cold in the night - a pair of socks are a few steps away, if I am thirsty - water is just a turn of the faucet, if it rains or snows - I have a roof over my head. I am blessed! Could you survive without a home to live in, food as easily as going to the grocery or to a restaurant, searching for water?
I am thankful for my senses!
I can hear the sounds of nature and the music of my grandchildren's voices. I can see the sunshine and the wind rearranging the limbs of the trees. I can feel the heat of the sun, the wet of the rain, the cold of the wind in fall and winter. I can talk with my friends and family. I can feel the roughness of sandpaper and the softness of a babies hair. I can smell the earth, the stringency of rosemary, the calming smell of peppermint and clary sage, and freshly washed sheets and towels. What would you do if you couldn't see, hear, talk, smell, or feel?
I am thankful that I have choices!
I can smell the aromatic and walk away from the odorous. I can get out of the rain or soak up the sun. I can talk or sit silently. I have a choice. I can make the decision of what I listen to, look at, taste, smell, or feel.
I am thankful that I am still in good health, mobile, and independent.
I can't do everything as I once did, but I can still do. Good health - I am not in a health institute nor do I have to see a doctor on a regular basis. I still move as needed - not as fast or as long as I once did, but I do move. I am not dependent on anyone for my basic needs.
I am thankful for the saving Grace of my Lord Jesus Christ and the mercy afforded me by his Crucifixion and Resurrection!
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Monday, November 21, 2016
Monday, October 24, 2016
Sunday, September 7, 2014
WOW!
A year and a half of news - how could I go so long without sharing my thoughts. Says a lot about my state of mind. Much loss, too much heart break, in my life in that year and a half. How do people worm their way into your life and then just pull out - no goodbyes, no hugs, nothing - just gone.
In August of last year my brother-in-law did just that! He was my friend and he died without even a good bye. In October a dear friend of many years lay dead at her computer while we waited on her at the Tea House. Just gone - no goodbyes, no "Love you", nothing. November brought the deadly stroke that started the illnesses that took my Father in January. Then another friend in June. In July Mother had two major blockages repaired and I am convinced they were from a broken heart. It is so hard when nothing brings joy to the broken hearted - the ones you love.
Some days my heart hurts with the missing of these family and friends and some days I laugh with joy at my memories. That is the way I want to be remembered - with joy and laughter!
Then a miracle was born in June and my heart starting melting and came out of shock. God knows our needs better than we do and he knows what we are going through every day. My fourth granddaughter was born bringing much joy and happiness. The birth of this child reminded me that life will go on - we have no control over God's plans for each and every one of us.
Now on to the present and the future with joy in our hearts!
About my little farm - out of 34 yard birds, I have 10 left (9 hens and 1 rooster). I am on the verge of transferring them to my daughter's farm as they have become very demanding and hard to handle. The coyotes and hawks have killed off most of my feathered friends and the snakes (removed two in one day from the laying box) and opossums (we trapped 6 in one week) are getting more eggs than I am getting. I think next Spring I will start over with a new batch and see how I manage. With no food here, maybe the varmints will move on to greener pastures. I have acquired a beautiful Land Shun that will be hard to part with.
It has been a hot summer here in central Georgia. One of the wettest springs that I can remember, but when the rain left it left for weeks. Even my rosemary dried on its own. The hibiscus is droopy and woody and the blooms have fallen off without opening. What the weather hasn't killed, the chickens have and they have enjoyed a wonderful crop of tomatoes while I had none!
Thanks for visiting and remember to Keep Smiling!
Belle
In August of last year my brother-in-law did just that! He was my friend and he died without even a good bye. In October a dear friend of many years lay dead at her computer while we waited on her at the Tea House. Just gone - no goodbyes, no "Love you", nothing. November brought the deadly stroke that started the illnesses that took my Father in January. Then another friend in June. In July Mother had two major blockages repaired and I am convinced they were from a broken heart. It is so hard when nothing brings joy to the broken hearted - the ones you love.
Some days my heart hurts with the missing of these family and friends and some days I laugh with joy at my memories. That is the way I want to be remembered - with joy and laughter!
Then a miracle was born in June and my heart starting melting and came out of shock. God knows our needs better than we do and he knows what we are going through every day. My fourth granddaughter was born bringing much joy and happiness. The birth of this child reminded me that life will go on - we have no control over God's plans for each and every one of us.
Now on to the present and the future with joy in our hearts!
About my little farm - out of 34 yard birds, I have 10 left (9 hens and 1 rooster). I am on the verge of transferring them to my daughter's farm as they have become very demanding and hard to handle. The coyotes and hawks have killed off most of my feathered friends and the snakes (removed two in one day from the laying box) and opossums (we trapped 6 in one week) are getting more eggs than I am getting. I think next Spring I will start over with a new batch and see how I manage. With no food here, maybe the varmints will move on to greener pastures. I have acquired a beautiful Land Shun that will be hard to part with.
It has been a hot summer here in central Georgia. One of the wettest springs that I can remember, but when the rain left it left for weeks. Even my rosemary dried on its own. The hibiscus is droopy and woody and the blooms have fallen off without opening. What the weather hasn't killed, the chickens have and they have enjoyed a wonderful crop of tomatoes while I had none!
Thanks for visiting and remember to Keep Smiling!
Belle
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
First Cousins
Once a quarter the first cousins of my Mother's brothers and sister get together for a meal and fellowship. When the first of us passed away a few years ago, her spouse came up with this idea and I must say it was a terrific idea!
My Mother is the last of her siblings and she gets lonesome for her family and their shared memories. It is a true boost to her morale when these dinners occur.
Time doesn't stop for any one and even though we think we will be here forever we all know that our days are numbered and time gets shorter with each passing day.
It was our honor to host a barbecue for these cousins last month and we had such a good time and great conversation. The ability to linger throughout the day and truly sit down and talk to each and everyone was a treat. I connected more with some of my cousins on this occasion than I have at any of the other dinners.
On Friday night we had the traditional barbecue fire and some of the guys cooked all night. There is nothing better for relaxation and visiting than a cook fire. Those that made it out on Friday night we thank you - we appreciated the help and enjoyed the company.
For those that couldn't make it, we missed you! Attached are a few shots of a wonderful weekend.
My Mother is the last of her siblings and she gets lonesome for her family and their shared memories. It is a true boost to her morale when these dinners occur.
Time doesn't stop for any one and even though we think we will be here forever we all know that our days are numbered and time gets shorter with each passing day.
It was our honor to host a barbecue for these cousins last month and we had such a good time and great conversation. The ability to linger throughout the day and truly sit down and talk to each and everyone was a treat. I connected more with some of my cousins on this occasion than I have at any of the other dinners.
On Friday night we had the traditional barbecue fire and some of the guys cooked all night. There is nothing better for relaxation and visiting than a cook fire. Those that made it out on Friday night we thank you - we appreciated the help and enjoyed the company.
For those that couldn't make it, we missed you! Attached are a few shots of a wonderful weekend.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
It was absolutely wonderful! I had a week with all my grandchildren and it was the best vacation I have had in a long time. I can't wait to do that again and hopefully the older two can return for a few extra days before the summer is out. I learned new things about the personalities of these kids and each one of these four always have something new to surprise me with.
Sunday was my daughter's birthday and we had a wonderful cookout and swim party. Lot's of fun with family and friends! Even my 87 year old Dad got in the action, but we couldn't get him in the pool. He did enjoy some delicious barbecue and Brunswick stew though and even some of those delicious friend green tomatoes! Sis and hubby got in on the action too. Mom must have been hiding from the camera. I can't find a shot of her anywhere!
A local church had a good fireworks display around 10:00 so we all trekked over and watched the sparkles and listened to the booms. We were even serenaded by the "3 J's" (my daughter-in-law,daughter, and other daughter). It was a fun filled day.
When my daughter was a toddler and terrified of fireworks she ask that we don't do the fireworks for her birthday anymore. On Monday night after their return north this same daughter was taking her children to town to watch the fireworks.
I hope that you had an enjoyable July fourth weekend and celebrated our declaration of independence with much joy and thankfulness.
Now on to more work, play and daily living!
Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Year 2010
A beautiful year, filled with meeting new friends, reuniting with old friends, fun visits with family, and yes, I must include the loss of so many friends. The year started cold and drab as each new year does and progressed to the joyous spring with the warm breezes teasing the blossoms on the trees and shrubs. Each season brought change not only to the landscapes but to my heart. Never one to shun a heated discussion, I have found I loath the negativity, anger, and hate found in so many. I wonder what life has served them to cause such feelings to linger and fester. There is so much in life to bring joy and peace if we only search for it and brush the harsher feeling aside.
Spring brought the loss of hubby's father. Sick for over a year with strange rash on his arms but no diagnosis of the cause, he succumbed to lung cancer in a matter of days after finally being diagnosed.
Spring also bought with it the reuniting of friends in preparation of a class reunion. It was a happy time for me to see the many friends and acquaintances of my youth. One weekend was not enough time, but we made the best of the time provided and many have continued to keep in touch. So many have died through the years and they were memorialized through the artistry of a fellow classmate.
Fun in the sun was the theme of our Summer and it was a time of relaxing and visiting with family and friends and enjoying the pool through the hot summer days. Wonderful food on the grill and homemade ice cream seem to top the charts on the weekends. The grandchildren are growing by leaps and bounds and changing from one visit to the next. It is a wonder to listen to their conversation and know their minds are growing as quickly as their bodies.
My garden flourished in the early days of summer, but succumbed to the heat and lack of rain quickly. Mulching more this winter for a better chance of survival during the hot dry days for the upcoming year. The asparagus is beautiful and since this is my first try I was very pleased with the results. None to gather this season, but come spring I should have a bumper crop. Now is the time to get my onions in, so I have to get busy with those.
Fall brought on a most memorable reunion with my best friend from school. One short visit of a couple of hours was not enough, but we are staying in touch and plan to revisit soon. It is such a comfort to reunite with someone that meant so much to me for so many years. It is strange to think that we were ever separated to begin with, but that is another story. Leave it to say that we are reunited and looking forward to catching up.
Mid afternoon the yard chickens come in for a bit of scratch feed. Week before last I rounded the corner of the barn and there was a beautiful tom turkey. Light gray and cream with a rose colored waddle, he gobbled at me and headed for the scratch I had put out for the hens. I watched for a minute and decided there was not enough to go around - he was eating like crazy. I spread another batch and he proceeded to follow me in my rounds to gather eggs and water the barn hens. I called hubby to the barn and it was decided he was a tame bird and hubby proceeded to visit the neighbors to locate the owner. No one claimed the bird and he seems to have made a home here. Free to come and go as he pleases, he prefers to stay close to the pen and visit with the pen birds. He makes a nice addition to the landscape and gobbles as I talk, doesn't appear to be aggressive, but not taking chances around the babies. Those talons look fierce and that beak could do some damage if provoked. He is a beautiful bird and fun to watch.
Thanksgiving and Christmas is always filled with lots of good food, long visits and a time of fun. I so enjoyed the visits with family and friends.
As I read back over this years happenings I know I have been greatly blessed. I look forward to the coming year with anticipation. I can't wait to see what God has in store for me next. Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Spring brought the loss of hubby's father. Sick for over a year with strange rash on his arms but no diagnosis of the cause, he succumbed to lung cancer in a matter of days after finally being diagnosed.
Spring also bought with it the reuniting of friends in preparation of a class reunion. It was a happy time for me to see the many friends and acquaintances of my youth. One weekend was not enough time, but we made the best of the time provided and many have continued to keep in touch. So many have died through the years and they were memorialized through the artistry of a fellow classmate.
Fun in the sun was the theme of our Summer and it was a time of relaxing and visiting with family and friends and enjoying the pool through the hot summer days. Wonderful food on the grill and homemade ice cream seem to top the charts on the weekends. The grandchildren are growing by leaps and bounds and changing from one visit to the next. It is a wonder to listen to their conversation and know their minds are growing as quickly as their bodies.
My garden flourished in the early days of summer, but succumbed to the heat and lack of rain quickly. Mulching more this winter for a better chance of survival during the hot dry days for the upcoming year. The asparagus is beautiful and since this is my first try I was very pleased with the results. None to gather this season, but come spring I should have a bumper crop. Now is the time to get my onions in, so I have to get busy with those.
Fall brought on a most memorable reunion with my best friend from school. One short visit of a couple of hours was not enough, but we are staying in touch and plan to revisit soon. It is such a comfort to reunite with someone that meant so much to me for so many years. It is strange to think that we were ever separated to begin with, but that is another story. Leave it to say that we are reunited and looking forward to catching up.
Mid afternoon the yard chickens come in for a bit of scratch feed. Week before last I rounded the corner of the barn and there was a beautiful tom turkey. Light gray and cream with a rose colored waddle, he gobbled at me and headed for the scratch I had put out for the hens. I watched for a minute and decided there was not enough to go around - he was eating like crazy. I spread another batch and he proceeded to follow me in my rounds to gather eggs and water the barn hens. I called hubby to the barn and it was decided he was a tame bird and hubby proceeded to visit the neighbors to locate the owner. No one claimed the bird and he seems to have made a home here. Free to come and go as he pleases, he prefers to stay close to the pen and visit with the pen birds. He makes a nice addition to the landscape and gobbles as I talk, doesn't appear to be aggressive, but not taking chances around the babies. Those talons look fierce and that beak could do some damage if provoked. He is a beautiful bird and fun to watch.
Thanksgiving and Christmas is always filled with lots of good food, long visits and a time of fun. I so enjoyed the visits with family and friends.
As I read back over this years happenings I know I have been greatly blessed. I look forward to the coming year with anticipation. I can't wait to see what God has in store for me next. Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Homeless
Homeless! Does that word bring to mind a person with no home, no warm fire to come home to, no hot meal waiting at the end of a long day? It is definitely that, but one can be homeless emotionally when they have left the home or town they have called home. Many years ago, my husband (who was in the Air Force) was stationed in Charleston, SC. It was so exciting to be moving to a new town, home, area and I was looking forward to the adventure. It took a few weeks to get settled in and take care of all the essentials. My first unsettling experience was at the post office. Our house was in a little community called Ladson. I stepped into the post office to the jabber of the employees and low, I couldn't understand a word being said. The nice gentleman looked at me and said "What?". Not may I help you or what do you need, just "What?". That was the only thing I understood during my first visit to this lovely little building. The rest I wrote down and somehow managed to get my address recorded and my mail started.
I left feeling so frustrated. I didn't know the people in this area spoke a different language. I came to really not like that post office. The people seem to be nice but we just did not communicate. I also had my first major accident turning into this same post office.
As the days drifted by, the loneliness drifted in. I was doing a lot of sewing and that kept me busy, but I had no one to talk to. It wasn't long until I went to work at a day care center in our neighborhood. The communication in itself was not a problem, but the attitude of these people were strange. One infants parents wanted the child to sleep all day so they could play with him all night. Another was fed so much and he was so large his fingers looked ready to pop. I had the infants - all 8 of them - alone! Two were ready to move up to another class, but there was no room, so I had two toddlers in with the 6 infants. I loved the babies, but went home exhausted everyday, knowing the same was waiting the next day. I didn't last long, 6 months was all I could handle, before I went looking for something else. Sears saved my sanity!
The friend problem had not been solved. As much as I talked to those precious infants, not one of them talked back. The other workers were nice as could be, but they were as busy as I was and there was no time for chatting.
It took some time, but as the new neighborhood filled up we met new people. It made things much easier, but it still wasn't home. My point is that a house doesn't make a home. Family and friends are the foundation of a home and happiness. During this Holiday season I commiserate with those away from their home. Remember your friends and families are anticipating your return visits and the days are not quite as full as they would be if you were at home with them.
Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
I left feeling so frustrated. I didn't know the people in this area spoke a different language. I came to really not like that post office. The people seem to be nice but we just did not communicate. I also had my first major accident turning into this same post office.
As the days drifted by, the loneliness drifted in. I was doing a lot of sewing and that kept me busy, but I had no one to talk to. It wasn't long until I went to work at a day care center in our neighborhood. The communication in itself was not a problem, but the attitude of these people were strange. One infants parents wanted the child to sleep all day so they could play with him all night. Another was fed so much and he was so large his fingers looked ready to pop. I had the infants - all 8 of them - alone! Two were ready to move up to another class, but there was no room, so I had two toddlers in with the 6 infants. I loved the babies, but went home exhausted everyday, knowing the same was waiting the next day. I didn't last long, 6 months was all I could handle, before I went looking for something else. Sears saved my sanity!
The friend problem had not been solved. As much as I talked to those precious infants, not one of them talked back. The other workers were nice as could be, but they were as busy as I was and there was no time for chatting.
It took some time, but as the new neighborhood filled up we met new people. It made things much easier, but it still wasn't home. My point is that a house doesn't make a home. Family and friends are the foundation of a home and happiness. During this Holiday season I commiserate with those away from their home. Remember your friends and families are anticipating your return visits and the days are not quite as full as they would be if you were at home with them.
Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
A wonderful extended weekend with family and friends! Good food, good fellowship, and great times. It has taken me a few days to recover, but that is age not infirmity.
I thank my daughters for straightening and cleaning after the fact and giving me a chance to recover without all that on my mind. I so enjoy having the family gather here for Thanksgiving and hopefully they enjoy coming.
The broke warm and sunny and provided the perfect weather for the kids to enjoy the outside and many to eat on the porch and patio. The counters and tables were filled with good food and everyone ate their fill. Dad stayed with us for four hours and went home to sleep it all off and get some rest. He called to make sure I was going to do it again at Christmas. The man does enjoy his food. He will celebrate his 87th birthday in January, so each year we are thankful he can still join us in celebration and thanksgiving. His health has gone down rapidly in the last three years, but he keeps on trucking. Mom moves a little slower than she once did, but don't we all. She doesn't look as if she has aged a day.
I am thankful for my family and the blessings I receive from each and everyone.
I thank my daughters for straightening and cleaning after the fact and giving me a chance to recover without all that on my mind. I so enjoy having the family gather here for Thanksgiving and hopefully they enjoy coming.
The broke warm and sunny and provided the perfect weather for the kids to enjoy the outside and many to eat on the porch and patio. The counters and tables were filled with good food and everyone ate their fill. Dad stayed with us for four hours and went home to sleep it all off and get some rest. He called to make sure I was going to do it again at Christmas. The man does enjoy his food. He will celebrate his 87th birthday in January, so each year we are thankful he can still join us in celebration and thanksgiving. His health has gone down rapidly in the last three years, but he keeps on trucking. Mom moves a little slower than she once did, but don't we all. She doesn't look as if she has aged a day.
I am thankful for my family and the blessings I receive from each and everyone.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
I thoroughly enjoyed my "Girlfriends in God" devotional this morning. It sent me to my Bible to read the last chapter. It reinforces all the promises of God and yes, it tells us everything ends as God has promised. If you get a chance today, visit "Girlfriends In God".
Big yard sale this weekend with goodies from multiple households. Hope people find the treasures among what we consider our junk. I am a pack rat and so are some of the participants of our sale, so there is no telling what you will turn up that you can't live without. I really enjoy "yard sales". I get to visit with neighbors who are too busy with their own lives to visit and I always meet new friends. It will be cold this weekend so the coffee will be flowing.
It seems to get further and further between visits of my daughter and her family. I get needy after a few weeks and sometimes my heart pines to touch my grandchildren. They still have that great child smell when you hug them and your chin hits the top of their heads. Their little arms - some getting longer- wrap around your waist and squeeze - it is the best feeling in the world.
I am once again getting in the sewing mood, so I hope to be turning out "something to die for" in the next few weeks. Hopefully I will get creative between now and then. Daughter has already gotten her customized Christmas stockings going and has received several orders. The year has flown by and it is closing on the end of another year.
Thanksgiving is right around the corner, I am so excited to see all the family once again. As time passes we seem to move hither and yon and don't stay in touch as we go about our business. Nephew is gracing us with some new recipes again this year and I am delighted to test his creations. There is so much to be thankful for this year. It has had its ups and downs, but as in the Bible, everything turned out okay.
Feeding a bunch of bikers a pot of chili for dinner, so I must get to it. Until next time . . .
Happy Reading!
Belle
Big yard sale this weekend with goodies from multiple households. Hope people find the treasures among what we consider our junk. I am a pack rat and so are some of the participants of our sale, so there is no telling what you will turn up that you can't live without. I really enjoy "yard sales". I get to visit with neighbors who are too busy with their own lives to visit and I always meet new friends. It will be cold this weekend so the coffee will be flowing.
It seems to get further and further between visits of my daughter and her family. I get needy after a few weeks and sometimes my heart pines to touch my grandchildren. They still have that great child smell when you hug them and your chin hits the top of their heads. Their little arms - some getting longer- wrap around your waist and squeeze - it is the best feeling in the world.
I am once again getting in the sewing mood, so I hope to be turning out "something to die for" in the next few weeks. Hopefully I will get creative between now and then. Daughter has already gotten her customized Christmas stockings going and has received several orders. The year has flown by and it is closing on the end of another year.
Thanksgiving is right around the corner, I am so excited to see all the family once again. As time passes we seem to move hither and yon and don't stay in touch as we go about our business. Nephew is gracing us with some new recipes again this year and I am delighted to test his creations. There is so much to be thankful for this year. It has had its ups and downs, but as in the Bible, everything turned out okay.
Feeding a bunch of bikers a pot of chili for dinner, so I must get to it. Until next time . . .
Happy Reading!
Belle
Monday, September 20, 2010
Catch up
Enjoyed a quick but joy filled visit with my daughter, my son, my nephew and their families. The babies are growing so fast these days and I am blessed to get to see them frequently to watch the changes that are taking place. There is no bigger changes than the first few months after "regular" or "real" school starts and they are exposed to the magic of learning and the meeting of new people. The exposure to the way others live and learn is a great part of the learning process.
Our small town enjoyed an annual festival this weekend of which I chose not to attend. It is still a little on the warm side for me to be out with thousands of pushing and shoving people all trying to avoid the heat and still the wonderful creations that might be new to this years event. Once in a while a new vendor will show up with something new and different and really cause a stir, but over the years we see the return of those we have seen many times before. I do miss the basket weavers that create their wares as we stand and watch. I could watch them for hours.
This week, and yes I know I am behind, I will dig up the hostas and divide them and hope I get enough crowns to have a beautiful grouping next spring. I have to move 9 crowns that are getting way too much sun and place them in a shaded area. The sun blistered most of them until they looked horrible in mid summer, but I should have known better than to expose them to full sun. They will have more shade next year and hopefully be as full and beautiful all summer as they were this spring.
Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Our small town enjoyed an annual festival this weekend of which I chose not to attend. It is still a little on the warm side for me to be out with thousands of pushing and shoving people all trying to avoid the heat and still the wonderful creations that might be new to this years event. Once in a while a new vendor will show up with something new and different and really cause a stir, but over the years we see the return of those we have seen many times before. I do miss the basket weavers that create their wares as we stand and watch. I could watch them for hours.
This week, and yes I know I am behind, I will dig up the hostas and divide them and hope I get enough crowns to have a beautiful grouping next spring. I have to move 9 crowns that are getting way too much sun and place them in a shaded area. The sun blistered most of them until they looked horrible in mid summer, but I should have known better than to expose them to full sun. They will have more shade next year and hopefully be as full and beautiful all summer as they were this spring.
Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Labor Day Weekend
The end of so much and the beginning of much more. This is the last holiday of the summer season. Will you be dove hunting on Saturday or trying to get in a final swim for this season, a quick weekend trip or a start on your fall camping early?
Kids are coming off the mountain for the weekend and spend some time with Nanna. I am looking forward to seeing them again before their holy days start and trek off to their feast site. It has really hit home how little time one has when little ones are in school and have a strict schedule to which they must adhere. I guess it has been a few years and I had forgotten how little time there is between getting off work and time for bed.
My grandchildren have a play room at our house. I try to enter this room about every two weeks - it can be a danger zone. The kids are not destructive, just very creative and the girls favorite game is dress up. We are big on passing down clothing and it seems the playroom is the central depository for the clothes in transition. Three weeks ago I trekked upstairs to straighten the playroon to find that something was blocking the door. Not knowing what was holding the door, I cracked it a little and ran my hand along the edge to see what was wedged behind it, only to find clothes, clothes and more clothes! Clothes covered every inch of the floor and the beds, but their "stage" (an old trunk I found at an estate sale) was clean as a whistle. There were a few building blocks and baby dolls under the bed, but these girls had every stitch of hand-me-down clothing scattered all over the room.
The fashion show that they can grace us with is astounding and brings me much joy. Already at their young ages you can see their style and taste in each outfit they put together. They can entertain themselves (and us) for hours and they have so much fun!
Hubby has plans to fill the smoker up with good eats and we plan to enjoy family and friends for the weekend. I hope all of you have a safe and happy holiday! I am already planning for Thanksgiving and another big get together!
Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Kids are coming off the mountain for the weekend and spend some time with Nanna. I am looking forward to seeing them again before their holy days start and trek off to their feast site. It has really hit home how little time one has when little ones are in school and have a strict schedule to which they must adhere. I guess it has been a few years and I had forgotten how little time there is between getting off work and time for bed.
My grandchildren have a play room at our house. I try to enter this room about every two weeks - it can be a danger zone. The kids are not destructive, just very creative and the girls favorite game is dress up. We are big on passing down clothing and it seems the playroom is the central depository for the clothes in transition. Three weeks ago I trekked upstairs to straighten the playroon to find that something was blocking the door. Not knowing what was holding the door, I cracked it a little and ran my hand along the edge to see what was wedged behind it, only to find clothes, clothes and more clothes! Clothes covered every inch of the floor and the beds, but their "stage" (an old trunk I found at an estate sale) was clean as a whistle. There were a few building blocks and baby dolls under the bed, but these girls had every stitch of hand-me-down clothing scattered all over the room.
The fashion show that they can grace us with is astounding and brings me much joy. Already at their young ages you can see their style and taste in each outfit they put together. They can entertain themselves (and us) for hours and they have so much fun!
Hubby has plans to fill the smoker up with good eats and we plan to enjoy family and friends for the weekend. I hope all of you have a safe and happy holiday! I am already planning for Thanksgiving and another big get together!
Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Monday, August 9, 2010
My Pleasure
Hubby and I had the honor of hosting a boy scout troop this weekend. Five young men and their leaders camped in the edge of the woods in back of our home. They were most pleasant and very well mannered. They did their "boy scout camping" stuff and we shared some of their free time. A thank you is not enough to express our gratitude to them for sharing allowing us to spend this last weekend before school starts back with them. Being pre-teen boys, hubby and I were unsure what we would encounter with these boys, but they reaffirmed our faith in the youth of today and the leaders of tomorrow. Thank you guys!
Saturday was a full day of a swimming birthday party. Our youngest granddaughter turned four this past week. The pool was filled with laughter and squeals as her friends and family all splashed away in the pool. In these long hot dog days of summer there is no better place to entertain so many little ones so effortless. Her maternal grandmother arrived with a splendid birthday cake that brought out the oohs and aahs of little ones and adults alike and sure brought a fantastic smile to the birthday girl. The three tiered pink cake topped with a crown and trimmed to the nines was beautiful and it was all eatable. This very talented lady's creations never cease to amaze me. Granddads, grandmas, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends all gathered to celebrate this one of a kind princess.
Sunday morning found me and hubby rocking on the porch with our coffee and our thoughts of a wonderful weekend. The house was awfully quiet with only the son-in-law left with us. Tired, but happy, we rocked, talked, and relaxed. We do realize we can no longer have this kind of weekend every week, but we sure do enjoy those that come along once in a while.
Thanks for stopping by and until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Monday, July 12, 2010
Be Very Careful
I am a Facebook fan. I really enjoy keeping in touch with friends and family via this media. I have re-connected with so many friends through this medium and on the whole it has been a most rewarding experience. I have learned, however, to be very very careful of not only what I post, but the verbiage I use in expressing myself. I have learned that what I post can easily be misinterpreted and can lead to a barrage of negative comments. I have also learned that there are different "kinds " of friends.
When I befriend someone on Facebook, I am allowing them access to my posted actions and thoughts. They are entitled to make what they want of those posts and I am left at their mercy - whether positive or negative. Sadly, most of the time the negativity takes the lead and I am left open to ridicule or worse pity. A handful of friends will make supportive comments and offer prayers up on my behalf in the proper Christian manner.
Not long ago, I received a message from someone I know of, but do not "know" accusing me of unkind comments. I have no association with this person, but have friends that are close friends of theirs and I was confused as to what she was referring to. Our mutual friends had made some unsavory comments referencing this person to me and my response was "I know the type." Big mistake, it was carried back that I had made the comments, which was totally untrue. This was confusion over the spoken word, imagine the impact if this had been written.
I have learned to keep my comments short, positive and hopefully expressive of my Christian faith. To those that I have poked fun at through any comments, I apologize profusely and will keep those comments off my posts henceforth.
Written words have the ability to make or break a person. There is no intonation available to indicate any emotion, there is no facial expressions to judge any emotion, there is just the words written down to be interpreted by the reader in any manner they see fit without the benefit of the emotion of the writer. So, be very careful of what you write and how you write. It may not be read by a supportive Christian with love in their hearts. Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
When I befriend someone on Facebook, I am allowing them access to my posted actions and thoughts. They are entitled to make what they want of those posts and I am left at their mercy - whether positive or negative. Sadly, most of the time the negativity takes the lead and I am left open to ridicule or worse pity. A handful of friends will make supportive comments and offer prayers up on my behalf in the proper Christian manner.
Not long ago, I received a message from someone I know of, but do not "know" accusing me of unkind comments. I have no association with this person, but have friends that are close friends of theirs and I was confused as to what she was referring to. Our mutual friends had made some unsavory comments referencing this person to me and my response was "I know the type." Big mistake, it was carried back that I had made the comments, which was totally untrue. This was confusion over the spoken word, imagine the impact if this had been written.
I have learned to keep my comments short, positive and hopefully expressive of my Christian faith. To those that I have poked fun at through any comments, I apologize profusely and will keep those comments off my posts henceforth.
Written words have the ability to make or break a person. There is no intonation available to indicate any emotion, there is no facial expressions to judge any emotion, there is just the words written down to be interpreted by the reader in any manner they see fit without the benefit of the emotion of the writer. So, be very careful of what you write and how you write. It may not be read by a supportive Christian with love in their hearts. Until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Unusual
My grandson and great nephew have a most unusual relationship. They are about a year apart in age and have some of the same interests. They have never lived close to each other or seen each other on a regular basis, yet during the twice a year visits they mesh totally. There is not doubt they are friends and it is uncanny how they fall into their "play" with such ease. Is this what is meant by the phrase "blood is thicker than water"?
Wouldn't it be nice if all relationships were as comforting and easy?
The past week of celebrating Independence Day was filled with eating, visiting, and remembering. Filled with love and laughter we all had a great time. Hubby even got the grill and the smoker filled up and we enjoyed a bit of everything. I liked the smoked salmon and talapia best, but the ribs, wings, roast, burgers, chops, and hot dogs were not to be ignored. Of course, I had to sample it all and the flavors were greatly enhance by brother-in-law's barbecue sauce.
I have to put in a plug here for the best marinate and basting sauce I have found. "Moore's" has both a buffalo wing sauce that is out of this world and also a steak sauce that enhances the flavor of fish, steak, and chicken without overpowering the meat's flavor. I don't precook (boil or fry) anything. Anytime you boil meat, you cook out the natural flavors stored in the bone and fat. If the meat is cooked slowly and thoroughly and kept moist (we use a spray bottled filled with olive oil, water, and vinegar) it is tender, flavorful and juicy. Then the meat is placed in a roasting pan and covered in the barbecue sauce of your choosing and return to the grill to simmer, allowing the sauce and the meat juices to mesh. It makes me hungry all over again!
I think the next big cookout will be a low country boil and I have already started gathering ingredients. This is Hubby's 50th birthday! We will try to fix him up a good pot of soup! Blast the oil spill - the cost of shrimp and crab legs are already climbing so he may be stuck with corn, potatoes, onions, and sausage. He won't mind though, it is the good company and spending time with family and friends that are important!
I hope your holiday was filled with joy. Thanks for visiting and until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Wouldn't it be nice if all relationships were as comforting and easy?
The past week of celebrating Independence Day was filled with eating, visiting, and remembering. Filled with love and laughter we all had a great time. Hubby even got the grill and the smoker filled up and we enjoyed a bit of everything. I liked the smoked salmon and talapia best, but the ribs, wings, roast, burgers, chops, and hot dogs were not to be ignored. Of course, I had to sample it all and the flavors were greatly enhance by brother-in-law's barbecue sauce.
I have to put in a plug here for the best marinate and basting sauce I have found. "Moore's" has both a buffalo wing sauce that is out of this world and also a steak sauce that enhances the flavor of fish, steak, and chicken without overpowering the meat's flavor. I don't precook (boil or fry) anything. Anytime you boil meat, you cook out the natural flavors stored in the bone and fat. If the meat is cooked slowly and thoroughly and kept moist (we use a spray bottled filled with olive oil, water, and vinegar) it is tender, flavorful and juicy. Then the meat is placed in a roasting pan and covered in the barbecue sauce of your choosing and return to the grill to simmer, allowing the sauce and the meat juices to mesh. It makes me hungry all over again!
I think the next big cookout will be a low country boil and I have already started gathering ingredients. This is Hubby's 50th birthday! We will try to fix him up a good pot of soup! Blast the oil spill - the cost of shrimp and crab legs are already climbing so he may be stuck with corn, potatoes, onions, and sausage. He won't mind though, it is the good company and spending time with family and friends that are important!
I hope your holiday was filled with joy. Thanks for visiting and until next time . . .
Happy reading!
Belle
Monday, June 21, 2010
Early Summer
If Summer has just arrived, what would be the appropriate name for the past two weeks of 90+ temperatures and breath taking humidity with no rain? I know most of Georgia has received some kind of rainfall, but not on my side of the mountain. I must be in some kind of trough where the rain refuses to fall. Neighbors on the north and neighbors on the south have gotten good soaking showers while we sit here and swelter as the garden slumps further and further to the ground. If this is a taste of the rest of the summer, then we are in for a scorcher.
The only thing thriving is the heat loving pests! As an outdoor person, I am fighting at the bit to get back outside and piddle in my flowers, herbs, and garden. Have you noticed that city folks have flower gardens, whereas country folks have flowers and gardens. Country folks don't have flower gardens, they have vegetable gardens or just plain gardens. The same applies to the yard. City folks have a lawn and country folks have a yard. Country folks cut the grass while city folks calls lawn maintenance to trim the lawn. When I lived in the city, I was a thing of wonder to my neighbors. I cut the grass, trimmed the shrubbery, planted my flowers and even put in a few tomato plants. How was I to know that women in the city didn't do such things. To each his own! I do things that bring me joy and I do like to share a smile with others.
I have been on a hiatus from writing for the past few weeks. No new ideas have poked their way into my sprightly brain until last night and then "Katie" appeared and she is trying to develop into a story line. We'll see where she goes, but she does not seem to be in a hurry to get put on paper.
We enjoyed a family get together this weekend with nieces from central Georgia. As always we had a great time with all the babies and children. We ate lots of good fish, hush puppies and cole slaw along with hand pattied hamburgers and some delicious hot spicy sausage. My brother-in-law can find the best of the best in the food line. His jalapeno ranch dip was just right with the fresh veggies from the garden. We never even got to the watermelons which are still on ice and just waiting to be cut. Some homemade ice cream would have gone well with the peach cobbler, but it wasn't really missed either as everyone was stuffed. We had a lot of laughs as we did the "remember whens" and took home new memories to be shared at a later date.
The kids enjoyed the pool even though the sun was blistering to the adults. I am already looking forward to Hubby's birthday in July (he'll turn 50 this year) when hopefully they will all return for more good food and fellowship. Where in the world does the stamina go when you get older? I can't ever remember the sun bothering me as a child, but it sure takes its toll on me now.
I have been nostalgic this week. I think our upcoming class reunion has sparked some memories that were lost in the everyday shuffle of life. As a child and young adult, almost all of my social activities were centered around our Church and sometimes were extended to a few other kids in our community that attended other churches. (Another city/country thing - City people live in a neighborhood whereas Country people live in a community.) I found that classmates are not the only people that have disappeared from my life. Some friends that were really close and I truly loved and enjoyed being with are gone from the area and I have no idea which direction they have taken. Some of this is my fault as I am typically a home body. I hate funerals and as weird as it sounds, funerals are a major contact source in this day and time. I think maybe this year I will have to attend the Reunion at our church and see just how many I can reconnect with, or at least locate, before I have to attend their funeral.
Before this gets too morbid I am signing off. Until next time . . .
Happy Reading!
Belle
The only thing thriving is the heat loving pests! As an outdoor person, I am fighting at the bit to get back outside and piddle in my flowers, herbs, and garden. Have you noticed that city folks have flower gardens, whereas country folks have flowers and gardens. Country folks don't have flower gardens, they have vegetable gardens or just plain gardens. The same applies to the yard. City folks have a lawn and country folks have a yard. Country folks cut the grass while city folks calls lawn maintenance to trim the lawn. When I lived in the city, I was a thing of wonder to my neighbors. I cut the grass, trimmed the shrubbery, planted my flowers and even put in a few tomato plants. How was I to know that women in the city didn't do such things. To each his own! I do things that bring me joy and I do like to share a smile with others.
I have been on a hiatus from writing for the past few weeks. No new ideas have poked their way into my sprightly brain until last night and then "Katie" appeared and she is trying to develop into a story line. We'll see where she goes, but she does not seem to be in a hurry to get put on paper.
We enjoyed a family get together this weekend with nieces from central Georgia. As always we had a great time with all the babies and children. We ate lots of good fish, hush puppies and cole slaw along with hand pattied hamburgers and some delicious hot spicy sausage. My brother-in-law can find the best of the best in the food line. His jalapeno ranch dip was just right with the fresh veggies from the garden. We never even got to the watermelons which are still on ice and just waiting to be cut. Some homemade ice cream would have gone well with the peach cobbler, but it wasn't really missed either as everyone was stuffed. We had a lot of laughs as we did the "remember whens" and took home new memories to be shared at a later date.
The kids enjoyed the pool even though the sun was blistering to the adults. I am already looking forward to Hubby's birthday in July (he'll turn 50 this year) when hopefully they will all return for more good food and fellowship. Where in the world does the stamina go when you get older? I can't ever remember the sun bothering me as a child, but it sure takes its toll on me now.
I have been nostalgic this week. I think our upcoming class reunion has sparked some memories that were lost in the everyday shuffle of life. As a child and young adult, almost all of my social activities were centered around our Church and sometimes were extended to a few other kids in our community that attended other churches. (Another city/country thing - City people live in a neighborhood whereas Country people live in a community.) I found that classmates are not the only people that have disappeared from my life. Some friends that were really close and I truly loved and enjoyed being with are gone from the area and I have no idea which direction they have taken. Some of this is my fault as I am typically a home body. I hate funerals and as weird as it sounds, funerals are a major contact source in this day and time. I think maybe this year I will have to attend the Reunion at our church and see just how many I can reconnect with, or at least locate, before I have to attend their funeral.
Before this gets too morbid I am signing off. Until next time . . .
Happy Reading!
Belle
Saturday, May 1, 2010
I have had a most enjoyable few days with my oldest grandchildren. My grandchildren never cease to amaze me with the way their wonderful minds work. None of the four are alike, but all seem to play well together and other than vying for the attention of either their PawPaw or myself, entertain each other well. I believe my grandson will probably be a writer (he has the most vivid imagination) or any attorney. He informed me this weekend that he was descended from Al Capone through my grandparents - he explained it all to me as we all had a great laugh over his tale, but alas, there is no way. He and my youngest granddaughter can take a little bit of information and build a huge story out of it - the facts get a little scrambled, but the story is there.
I could sit and listen to them for hours. It is so amazing at the things that draw their attention and how they process, interpret and relay information. I am so pleased at their level of maturity and ability to ask intelligent questions and comprehend information. Yeah, I know I am prejudice, but that is the perogative of a grandmother.
As I had business at the Clerk of Court's Office this week they accompanied me. They had a great time meeting friends at the Courthouse, touring the building, and getting a quick explanation of what each office was responsible for and how the court system worked . Then we made a trip to the Old Jail Museum and was given a great tour courtesy of the curator. The curator is the most knowledgeable person around for the history of our area and she is not even a native of our county.
The following day, they toured the local cemetaries, located an old tobacco drying barn and last but definitely not least visited the new Super Wal Mart in Forsyth. It was a full afternoon, but an enjoyable one. My grandson enjoyed meeting family almost everywhere we went and was even invited to a cousin's house to ride a goat. I am sure that goat will still be waiting when he makes his next trip south and the invitation will still be open.
It is a secure and comforting feeling to know that so many people know you or are related to you in an area. It gives you a connection that provides stability and security. It is something that is so often taken for granted, but is so precious.
Thanks to the ever expanding flock of chickens, there is work to do tomorrow, so I will close for now. Until next time,
Happy reading!
Belle
I could sit and listen to them for hours. It is so amazing at the things that draw their attention and how they process, interpret and relay information. I am so pleased at their level of maturity and ability to ask intelligent questions and comprehend information. Yeah, I know I am prejudice, but that is the perogative of a grandmother.
As I had business at the Clerk of Court's Office this week they accompanied me. They had a great time meeting friends at the Courthouse, touring the building, and getting a quick explanation of what each office was responsible for and how the court system worked . Then we made a trip to the Old Jail Museum and was given a great tour courtesy of the curator. The curator is the most knowledgeable person around for the history of our area and she is not even a native of our county.
The following day, they toured the local cemetaries, located an old tobacco drying barn and last but definitely not least visited the new Super Wal Mart in Forsyth. It was a full afternoon, but an enjoyable one. My grandson enjoyed meeting family almost everywhere we went and was even invited to a cousin's house to ride a goat. I am sure that goat will still be waiting when he makes his next trip south and the invitation will still be open.
It is a secure and comforting feeling to know that so many people know you or are related to you in an area. It gives you a connection that provides stability and security. It is something that is so often taken for granted, but is so precious.
Thanks to the ever expanding flock of chickens, there is work to do tomorrow, so I will close for now. Until next time,
Happy reading!
Belle
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Reflections
"Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you."
Exodus 20:12 NIV
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor you father and mother" --which is the first commandment with a promise -- "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.""
Ephesians 6:1-4 NIV
"In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church - for we are members of his body. " For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."This is a profound mystery - but I am talking about Christ and the Church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."
Ephesians 5:28-33 NIV
When do we stop being children? What is the point in our lives when we stop obeying our parents and make our own decisions for our life? Is it at the point of marriage? There is no where is the Bible that says you are no longer a child at 18 or 21.
Some parents don't know when to let go - to let their children lead their own lives and be responsible for their own decisions and actions. Some children don't know when to quit depending on their parents, after all it is much easier to let someone else take care of you than it is to to take care of yourself.
As children, we rant and rail against parental control, yet when we reach adulthood we find that life is not so easy. Many would rather let their parents make the decisions. In the same vein, some parents are afraid of being alone so they make their children dependent on them thereby inhibiting their child's emotional and psychological growth.
What happens when the parents are gone? A dependent child, unable to make decisions on their own, will flounder, be confused and may not seem to grieve for their lost parent. They will search for someone else to be their caretaker, to help them make decisions. An independent child will feel grief for their lost, but will continue with little interruption in their day to day living.
Some parents try to control their children so much that when adulthood is reached, the child escapes to get away from their parents. Some move away, some cut off all contact with their parents. Others are so afraid of making a mistake they stay under their parent's control where they feel safe.
A man gets married and establishes a home for he and his wife. He is intelligent, well adjusted, works hard and provides well for his family. Over the years drastic changes occur in his parent's lives. They become confused and start to flounder. They become emotionally dependent on their son. This emotional dependency rapidly progresses to a desire to be the "child's" parent and exercise parental control once again. This well established, self sufficient man balks at the interference in his life. To stop the interference and control the man shuns his parents and severs all ties leaving him feeling bereft and angry and his parents frustrated and angry.
A woman raised in a harsh disciplinary home gets married and moves away. This woman was well prepared for the world as she had taken care of her parent's household and learned to be independent. She and her husband establish their own home and began their family. As the years past, her parent's retire and as time passes they lose their contacts and failed to remain active. They turned their focus on their daughter's life again trying to exercise parental control. The unwelcome intrusion into this woman's life causes many rifts and heartaches. She now limits her contact with her parents.
A man raised in an unstable household, gets married and moves not far from his parents. He works hard every day and builds a family. However, he continues to go to his father and mother for support and help in his decision making. When his family falls apart he returns to the home of his father. As time passes, he loses both parents and is left alone. He does not know which direction to go and searches to find help from others.
My earlier post addressed the question of what makes a good parent. We take what we think is the best part of how we were raised and apply it to the raising of our children. Our children will hopefully do the same. As children we turn to our parents for guidance, security, and support.
Adult children can still find comfort and security in a relationship with their parents, but you must set guidelines for yourself (you cannot control your parents actions) and stick with those guidelines. It starts with viewing your parents as individuals, not as your parents - if you are close to your parents, then view them as a close friend. But remember, they are people with their own interests, habits, customs, lifestyle. You do not always agree with choices your friends make, why would you expect to always agree to the choices your parents make? Unless you are financially dependent on your parents, do not discuss your financial situation with them - if they probe, tell them it is none of their business. It may hurt their feelings at first, but it will stop a lot of frustration and anger on your part and most people don't discuss finances with their friends.
Find a common ground between you and your parents. Always try to be positive. If you don't want to be ridiculed, don't ridicule your parents - believe me, parents are fully aware of the mistakes they have made. Don't bring up unpleasant incidences from the past. I have many bad memories of my childhood, but they are my memories - no one else remembers in the same way or with the same feelings I have. Don't bring your siblings into the mix. Your parents relationship with your siblings are their business. Don't judge - God will take care of that. Don't allow your parents to pull out the guilt trip bag. The past is over, it can't be undone. What you did when you were 16 should have been handled at the time. Too late now to relive or judge what should or should not have been done. Gifts are gifts. I have heard so many times "you forget I gave you" or "after all I have done for you" - it doesn't matter! If it was not given freely and with a loving heart, it wasn't a gift at all and if it is something that can be returned - do so! Reminders of things given is another venue of manipulation and has no place in a parent child relationship and certainly not in a friendship.
If you have to say you are sorry - do so with meaning - know why you are sorry. Explain yourself with kindness. My parents are now old (I hope they don't read this) and old people can be mean, hateful, and spiteful. It is okay, you don't know what these people we call parents are carrying on their hearts. It could be regret, loneliness, defeat, loss, or just confusion. I see so much hate and bitterness in this world. Be nice!
Now I am going to repeat myself - children do not come with instructions. BUT, the Bible is the best instruction book I have found for living life and that includes raising children. When things get rough there are a multitude of scriptures to ease our hearts and minds.
Thank you for dropping by!
Happy reading!
Belle
Exodus 20:12 NIV
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor you father and mother" --which is the first commandment with a promise -- "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.""
Ephesians 6:1-4 NIV
"In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church - for we are members of his body. " For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."This is a profound mystery - but I am talking about Christ and the Church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."
Ephesians 5:28-33 NIV
When do we stop being children? What is the point in our lives when we stop obeying our parents and make our own decisions for our life? Is it at the point of marriage? There is no where is the Bible that says you are no longer a child at 18 or 21.
Some parents don't know when to let go - to let their children lead their own lives and be responsible for their own decisions and actions. Some children don't know when to quit depending on their parents, after all it is much easier to let someone else take care of you than it is to to take care of yourself.
As children, we rant and rail against parental control, yet when we reach adulthood we find that life is not so easy. Many would rather let their parents make the decisions. In the same vein, some parents are afraid of being alone so they make their children dependent on them thereby inhibiting their child's emotional and psychological growth.
What happens when the parents are gone? A dependent child, unable to make decisions on their own, will flounder, be confused and may not seem to grieve for their lost parent. They will search for someone else to be their caretaker, to help them make decisions. An independent child will feel grief for their lost, but will continue with little interruption in their day to day living.
Some parents try to control their children so much that when adulthood is reached, the child escapes to get away from their parents. Some move away, some cut off all contact with their parents. Others are so afraid of making a mistake they stay under their parent's control where they feel safe.
A man gets married and establishes a home for he and his wife. He is intelligent, well adjusted, works hard and provides well for his family. Over the years drastic changes occur in his parent's lives. They become confused and start to flounder. They become emotionally dependent on their son. This emotional dependency rapidly progresses to a desire to be the "child's" parent and exercise parental control once again. This well established, self sufficient man balks at the interference in his life. To stop the interference and control the man shuns his parents and severs all ties leaving him feeling bereft and angry and his parents frustrated and angry.
A woman raised in a harsh disciplinary home gets married and moves away. This woman was well prepared for the world as she had taken care of her parent's household and learned to be independent. She and her husband establish their own home and began their family. As the years past, her parent's retire and as time passes they lose their contacts and failed to remain active. They turned their focus on their daughter's life again trying to exercise parental control. The unwelcome intrusion into this woman's life causes many rifts and heartaches. She now limits her contact with her parents.
A man raised in an unstable household, gets married and moves not far from his parents. He works hard every day and builds a family. However, he continues to go to his father and mother for support and help in his decision making. When his family falls apart he returns to the home of his father. As time passes, he loses both parents and is left alone. He does not know which direction to go and searches to find help from others.
My earlier post addressed the question of what makes a good parent. We take what we think is the best part of how we were raised and apply it to the raising of our children. Our children will hopefully do the same. As children we turn to our parents for guidance, security, and support.
Adult children can still find comfort and security in a relationship with their parents, but you must set guidelines for yourself (you cannot control your parents actions) and stick with those guidelines. It starts with viewing your parents as individuals, not as your parents - if you are close to your parents, then view them as a close friend. But remember, they are people with their own interests, habits, customs, lifestyle. You do not always agree with choices your friends make, why would you expect to always agree to the choices your parents make? Unless you are financially dependent on your parents, do not discuss your financial situation with them - if they probe, tell them it is none of their business. It may hurt their feelings at first, but it will stop a lot of frustration and anger on your part and most people don't discuss finances with their friends.
Find a common ground between you and your parents. Always try to be positive. If you don't want to be ridiculed, don't ridicule your parents - believe me, parents are fully aware of the mistakes they have made. Don't bring up unpleasant incidences from the past. I have many bad memories of my childhood, but they are my memories - no one else remembers in the same way or with the same feelings I have. Don't bring your siblings into the mix. Your parents relationship with your siblings are their business. Don't judge - God will take care of that. Don't allow your parents to pull out the guilt trip bag. The past is over, it can't be undone. What you did when you were 16 should have been handled at the time. Too late now to relive or judge what should or should not have been done. Gifts are gifts. I have heard so many times "you forget I gave you" or "after all I have done for you" - it doesn't matter! If it was not given freely and with a loving heart, it wasn't a gift at all and if it is something that can be returned - do so! Reminders of things given is another venue of manipulation and has no place in a parent child relationship and certainly not in a friendship.
If you have to say you are sorry - do so with meaning - know why you are sorry. Explain yourself with kindness. My parents are now old (I hope they don't read this) and old people can be mean, hateful, and spiteful. It is okay, you don't know what these people we call parents are carrying on their hearts. It could be regret, loneliness, defeat, loss, or just confusion. I see so much hate and bitterness in this world. Be nice!
Now I am going to repeat myself - children do not come with instructions. BUT, the Bible is the best instruction book I have found for living life and that includes raising children. When things get rough there are a multitude of scriptures to ease our hearts and minds.
Thank you for dropping by!
Happy reading!
Belle
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Contentment
What a wonderful Christmas season! Get togethers are so much fun when egos are left at home. For our family the focus was on the little ones and they really put on a show! Each of the children were not only excited by their own gifts, they were excited for their brothers, sisters, and cousins. They laughed, shared, and played - gleeful as wished for and each brought a smile to our faces.
We are a female dominate family with five girls and four boys, but on Christmas Eve there were four girls and one boy and he quickly learned he was definitely outnumbered. However, with the grace and charm of a true gentleman, he fell right in with the girls, depending on Dad and uncles when he needed support.
Mom and Dad did not get too tired but were more than ready for us to clear out and give them their quiet. Dad got a real laugh over the suspenders that Mom gave him and there was a gleam in his eye when he opened box after box of his favorite candy - peanut brittle. Mom seemed a little confused as her gift pile mounted, but did so with a smile on her face. My Mother has always been the big giver in the family and a much appreciated one at that. This year with her limited mobility and lack of stamina, she assured that all had a gift, but could not manage to shop as diligently as she once could. Ah-h-h! The benefits of getting older. I am not a shopper!
The older boys were told they had to get under the piano to open their presents as through the years, that is where they would hide, knowing that Mom had purchased them all underwear and socks. Getting under the piano to open a present has become a favorite joke that the little ones still don't understand.
As the little ones got tired and fussy still thinking of Santa to come, as the big ones dreamed of pajamas and bed, we all quietly slipped away so Nanny and Pa could rest. I am so blessed to have such a loving and compassionate family. God has blessed us with his love and given us the joy of living along with the contentment gained from both.
As we look forward to the coming year, I wish for peace, joy and contentment for everyone. May God bless each heart with forgiveness, understanding, and compassion for our fellow man.
Happy reading!
Belle
We are a female dominate family with five girls and four boys, but on Christmas Eve there were four girls and one boy and he quickly learned he was definitely outnumbered. However, with the grace and charm of a true gentleman, he fell right in with the girls, depending on Dad and uncles when he needed support.
Mom and Dad did not get too tired but were more than ready for us to clear out and give them their quiet. Dad got a real laugh over the suspenders that Mom gave him and there was a gleam in his eye when he opened box after box of his favorite candy - peanut brittle. Mom seemed a little confused as her gift pile mounted, but did so with a smile on her face. My Mother has always been the big giver in the family and a much appreciated one at that. This year with her limited mobility and lack of stamina, she assured that all had a gift, but could not manage to shop as diligently as she once could. Ah-h-h! The benefits of getting older. I am not a shopper!
The older boys were told they had to get under the piano to open their presents as through the years, that is where they would hide, knowing that Mom had purchased them all underwear and socks. Getting under the piano to open a present has become a favorite joke that the little ones still don't understand.
As the little ones got tired and fussy still thinking of Santa to come, as the big ones dreamed of pajamas and bed, we all quietly slipped away so Nanny and Pa could rest. I am so blessed to have such a loving and compassionate family. God has blessed us with his love and given us the joy of living along with the contentment gained from both.
As we look forward to the coming year, I wish for peace, joy and contentment for everyone. May God bless each heart with forgiveness, understanding, and compassion for our fellow man.
Happy reading!
Belle
Monday, November 30, 2009
Memorable Thanksgiving
A feast prepared by the talented and loving hands of my family was displayed and then devoured. We ate like we had not eaten all year and then ate some more. My nephew is a Paula Dean fan, so we enjoyed some of her delicious recipes. He told me all the names, but you can forget that, but the fried green tomatoes were a delight. The bread, sausage and cheese casserole was to die for. The pumpkin cheesecake was not only beautiful, but tasty too. Another nephew delighted my taste buds with a pork tenderloin and another with a delicious chocolate peanut butter pie that was not only beautiful, but delicious. The green beans, squash casserole, sweet potatoes, potato salad and macaroni and cheese balanced out the dinner.
The turkeys cooked in apple cider and beer were a real hit as was my daughters dressing as usual. My extra daughter surprised us with her cranberry congealed salad which was delicious. Thanks to my sister in law I had a slice of wonderful coconut pie and pumpkin pie. I am still enjoying the carrot cake my daughter in law brought. The children almost fought over the monkey bread which they finished just before bedtime. The boy cousins had a sleep over at Aunt Nanna Belle's house. It was a real treat for me and I hope for them.
When cousins don't get to see each other often, they have to squeeze every second from every minute they are together. Thank goodness they all get along and are not together long enough to get tired of each other. They had a great time together and built memories for their brain bank.
Mom and Dad arrived and had a great old time. Dad isn't as mobile as he once was, but still manages to get around. We even managed a family picture! It has been a while since everyone was together at one time, so Mom took advantage of it. We have such a great family!
It was a perfect day for the kids to play outside and they took advantage of every minute of daylight, which isn't much this time of year. The older boys took to the woods while our little angels stayed on the porch and did their shopping and tended their dolls. Then they all played a little baseball, but the little one's lack of abilities caused the game to fall short. Give them a few more years and we will have a heck of a ball team. We have 5 girls and 4 boys - just right for a baseball team.
And today, I am thankful for a wonderful Thanksgiving and a loving family.
Happy Reading!
Belle
The turkeys cooked in apple cider and beer were a real hit as was my daughters dressing as usual. My extra daughter surprised us with her cranberry congealed salad which was delicious. Thanks to my sister in law I had a slice of wonderful coconut pie and pumpkin pie. I am still enjoying the carrot cake my daughter in law brought. The children almost fought over the monkey bread which they finished just before bedtime. The boy cousins had a sleep over at Aunt Nanna Belle's house. It was a real treat for me and I hope for them.
When cousins don't get to see each other often, they have to squeeze every second from every minute they are together. Thank goodness they all get along and are not together long enough to get tired of each other. They had a great time together and built memories for their brain bank.
Mom and Dad arrived and had a great old time. Dad isn't as mobile as he once was, but still manages to get around. We even managed a family picture! It has been a while since everyone was together at one time, so Mom took advantage of it. We have such a great family!
It was a perfect day for the kids to play outside and they took advantage of every minute of daylight, which isn't much this time of year. The older boys took to the woods while our little angels stayed on the porch and did their shopping and tended their dolls. Then they all played a little baseball, but the little one's lack of abilities caused the game to fall short. Give them a few more years and we will have a heck of a ball team. We have 5 girls and 4 boys - just right for a baseball team.
And today, I am thankful for a wonderful Thanksgiving and a loving family.
Happy Reading!
Belle
Monday, November 23, 2009
I Feel Good
Food is cooking. the smells are divine, fire in the fireplace, the house is almost clean and family is on the way! I love Thanksgiving.
Turkey and Dressing
Venison Roast
All the good relishes
Veggies
and my oh my, pies and cakes and all the goodies!
I have so much to be thankful for this year!
Thank you sweet Jesus for all the blessing you have bestowed upon me and mine this past year. We are far from worthy of your many blessing, but we love you, Jesus, and we pray for your guiding hand in all we say and do. Amen.
Turkey and Dressing
Venison Roast
All the good relishes
Veggies
and my oh my, pies and cakes and all the goodies!
I have so much to be thankful for this year!
Thank you sweet Jesus for all the blessing you have bestowed upon me and mine this past year. We are far from worthy of your many blessing, but we love you, Jesus, and we pray for your guiding hand in all we say and do. Amen.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)